A Hot Mess

Since deciding to only do one post in a week, coming up with a topic comes much easier to me. Especially, because it is Sunday and my day starts off with watching the streamed services of Harvest Christian Fellowship with Pastor Greg Laurie. Today’s message was about the characteristics of the disciples, prayer and how Jesus takes a mess and makes them messengers. Quite a bit of food for thought for today.

As I’m starting to carry out my responsibilities for the day, I had to redo my priorities for the day. Sometimes I think that I have to get everything I have listed done in one day — that’s just not true. Then it puts a little bit of pressure on me, because I have to strategize how to get things done. Sometimes, I just want to turn everything off and just concentrate on one thing instead of feeling the need to multitask. I quite often ask myself, Cindy, why are you trying to accomplish everything in one day? So then I step back and think about what “really” needs to be accomplished and I release some of my tasks for another day. Believe me, every tasks will get done, because I don’t like things to stay unattended to for very long. One of my tasks for this weekend was to install security cameras and a doorbell camera at Tommy’s original apartment. There have been some things there that aren’t settling right with me and Tommy these days. Every time we are gone for long periods and return, there always seems to be something out of place or marks that weren’t there the last time we visited. We are hoping that someone isn’t taking the liberty of realizing we aren’t there everyday and letting themselves in for some reason. We have a written contract with the management company that they are supposed to give us notice if they are going to enter into the apartment and we haven’t gotten any notices lately. So I figured I can solve our curiosity by setting up cameras and not having to worry about it anymore.

When I was listening to today’s message, I couldn’t help but reflect how my character might look to other people. I love how Jesus gave James and John the name Sons of Thunder, because they just blurted things out as to what they were thinking, instead of thinking about it first before blurting it out. I used to be like that because of my lack of filters, but I’ve learned when to restrain myself from saying something inappropriate or insensitive. I could think of a million names that would characterize my personality. Some of them aren’t so nice. It is safe to say that there has been a lot of transformation and restoration in my life over the 65 almost 66 years that I have lived. There were a lot of years where I would be characterized as a hot mess. I just kept wanting to do things my way instead of being logical and patient. Some things worked out pretty good, but there was a lot of room for improvement.

I laugh because I started thinking about people who are in my life who I could offer a characteristic nick name. For some reason, my Mother’s siblings (including herself) were brought up to speak their minds. It didn’t matter who they were saying whatever to, they would just say it. I remember one Uncle in particular who hadn’t seen me for years and he saw me and asked me what happened to me because I had gotten so fat, he almost didn’t recognize me. Mind you this Uncle for most of his life had a weight issue and I would have thought would have been more sensitive — nope. That’s kind of the example of things that were said to the cousins and no one was exempt. I guess sensitivity wasn’t part of their upbringing. The Siblings of Blatant Descriptives. For many of those same siblings though I had the pleasure of seeing their lives transformed before my eyes. One thing that can be said about them all is that they sure did know how to love and accept you for who you were.

So today I thought I would share with you some of the wisdom that was shared today. One of the things shared was Why do we pray?  I always thought it was a way to communicate with God through Jesus and ask for forgiveness. However, there were four points mentioned.  We pray because 1. We were told by Jesus to pray. (Luke 18:1) — Jesus also told us how we should pray through the Lord’s Prayer example —  2. We can cast worry and anxiety away. (Philippians 4:6) 3. To obtain things and address our needs. (James 5:13) and last but not least, 4. To get wisdom. (James 1:5)

Also, a quote that was shared by Pastor Greg Laurie resonated with me. He shared about the personalities of each of the disciples and how if you were to look at each one, you might think to yourself, why did Jesus choose them of all people. Because Jesus saw them through his eyes and not what others perceived on the surface. So the quote that resonated with me was “Jesus takes a mess and makes them into messengers.” — You can see this is true through the disciples he selected and also through many of the prophets and apostles He chose to be instrumental in putting forth His ministry. If you reflect on your own life and are a follower of Christ, you can certainly see how He possibly has made something out of you for His purpose — and maybe at one time, like myself, you were just a hot mess.

Pastor Greg also shared a story about an old violin that was being auctioned off.. People would offer a small token sum to buy it, but then a master violinist picked up that same violin and played the most masterful pieces on it. Those who heard it were amazed at how beautiful the violin sounded and started to throw out bids to the owner of the violin. The story ends with the violin selling for $10,000. You ask why the change in the value of the violin, because it was touched by the Master’s hand. The same goes for us, once the Master touches our lives, He can change us and make us into the Masterpieces we were meant to be through Him.

In writing this blog, I share what I know and what I’ve learned so that you too can enjoy some food for thought — after all I’m just His messenger.