Surrounded By Angels

There have been many times in my life that I considered "going through trials". We all have had them. Particularly one that always seems to come up often is the trials of financial insecurity. How about those times as you are raising a family and things just seem to be chaotic and you can't quite get things organized for yourself? The trials that affect a loved one's health or even your own health. I've shared in my previous blogs incidents and trials that affected my protection and safety. As you go through these trials, why do we feel that we always have to face them alone?

Because I've known about Jesus from a very young age, I've quite often prayed about particular trials. I can tell you that there was always a way out of them. Always a way to get through them. However, another thing that I've learned is that you have to be proactive in order the change the outcome. You can pray about them, but what can you do to change your circumstances? Quite often, God sends us a messenger or someone who has witnessed our struggles. Often times as I'm going through my trials, a friend, an acquaintance or a family member will ask me how things are going in my life and I respond -- "Oh, things are great.? Things are fine." Why do we do that? When inside we are torn up because of some trial we are facing or going through. As I reflect back on some of these circumstances, I know pride has gotten in the way of me. I'm writing today to let you know that when things are going awry, it's okay to ask for help.

I remember when I was five months pregnant with my twin boys, I started losing them. I ended up going to ER and they were able to stop the contractions. However, as the result of this incident, I would be put on bedrest for four months. First thing I did was go to my employer and tell him that I'm going to have to be on bedrest for four months. At the time, my job was my primary source of income for my family. I know I had accumulated a lot of sick leave by this time, but I hadn't thought I accumulated enough for four months of leave. He assured me that my priority was making sure my babies were born healthy and for the duration they needed as I was on bedrest. This was before I was a Human Resources manager and I didn't know that there were benefits that would be attached in order to assure I got paid my full wages up until after I had my caesarean and recovery period. There was some work in the background that I didn't know about -- I believe unbeknownst to me, someone had donated some sick days to me in order to help me get through this time period without financial stress -- I believe said person was probably my boss at that time. During this time, my BFF’s husband gave up his lazy boy recliner and delivered it to my bedroom, because I couldn’t climb onto my high bed. He relinquished his favorite chair for four months so I could rest and sleep comfortably. They helped me continuously through this time. My husband was in the military and based in LeMoore, CA. My Mom also came toward the end of my pregnancy and after the twins were born to help me. My mother in law also came for a duration after the twins were born.

Another trial that I went through that impacted my life drastically was when my ex-husband had developed sepsis, he coded and nearly died. He too had a long recovery -- 74 days in the hospital. When he initially got sick, I had been going to church for quite awhile. I had several friends, but I hadn't realized how many friends I had made until this trial. When I initially went to the hospital with my husband, I had to leave my then teenage boys who were attending college on their own. However, they hadn't yet learned how to drive, so my conundrum was -- how will they get to school and back? That's when two wonderful friends stepped forward for me and told me -- "Cindy, you have a whole church that is going to help you get through this.?" Along with my church family getting involved, I had a cousin, who actually volunteered to come stay with my boys until I was able to break free from the hospital, which was at Stanford -- quite a distance from Los Banos. Everyday that I was away from my family, several different friends would show up and hand me envelopes. They had formed a meal train (this is where different people provide meals to the families going through some sort of crisis) -- most meal trains go for only a couple weeks -- they provided meals for my family for over two months. Can you imagine? These people made sure that my boys got to and from school until I was able to come home -- there were meals that had been provided that I'd come home to eat that I didn't have to prepare in order to be able to go back to the hospital the following morning and start again for over two months. Even though my husband wasn't able to help subsidize our income, there was always enough money with the money I was pulling in through my retirement to make the bills. The reason, the church helped me with meals and travel expenses. I'll never forget people from my church walking toward me at the hospital with cups of Starbucks. I'm talking Venti sized cups. They'd always ask me before they came to visit, "Cindy what can we bring you?" They would insist to let them bless me, because initially I would tell them I didn't need anything. They would insist I needed something that would make me feel a little better. It was always a cup of coffee -- and it was always a huge cup or a thermos full. They'd walk up with food for me. Along with these tangible gifts were the spiritual ones as well. I remember the Pastors calling me and providing me words of comfort. I remember Pastors visiting me and praying over me -- laying hands on my husband and anointing him so he would be healed through the power of fervent prayer to God through Jesus. I remember friends and family coming and just letting me cry -- where no words were even spoken. I remember one night that my cousin was staying with me, we had some conversation, but as we were talking she was holding my hand. I was exhausted and crying and she let me fall asleep holding her hand. Usually when I got home, it was very late. There finally came a point where normalcy could somewhat return when my husband was transferred from Stanford to Emmanuel, a hospital in Turlock. The traveling was much easier back and forth, but I still stayed from the beginning of visiting hours until they ended. All during this time, friends and family would help me in anyway they could. Covid also happened during this period and I was sent home from the hospital and had to leave my husband to advocate for himself. The church got me through the toilet paper crisis. (I shared about this in a previous blog as well.)

I will never forget when my friends had arranged for all my senior group friends to come and meet me for lunch one day. They all carpooled and we met at a Mexican restaurant and for about two hours, I had prayer, laughter and encouraging conversations. I tried to pay my share and of course, they had taken care of my lunch. Oh the tears that flowed that day. They also brought me a beautiful bouquet of flowers.

I'm going to give a shout out to the Our Father's House in Los Banos for what they did for me during what I consider one of the hardest trials in my life. And of course, to all the family and friends that surrounded me during that time. Again, I would be remiss to not mention my own children. My own children, after we found out what my husband had been diagnosed with, they all went through our home and disinfected and washed everything for me. It was the first time as their mother that I saw what my children were capable of accomplishing as a family unit when I couldn't be there to delegate or tell them what needed to be done. My oldest son had taken time off work to be able to assist our family. He had even paid for other family members to fly in and paid for accommodations for hotel rooms when we were still at Stanford. My husband's family flew out as well during the earliest of days when my husband was battling the worst. Again, my friends and family took care of everything I needed and didn't want me to worry about anything, but being a support system to my husband. This included my BFF and her husband who also drove up and spent time with me and my husband in a hotel room and at the hospital.

In previous blogs, I shared with you how my Godfather, Uncles and Aunts always played a role in assuring my protection and well being. Throughout my life, God has always sent the messengers. Although I know there is a spiritual realm of angels we can't see that surrounds us and protects us on a daily basis, but truly my life has been so blessed by the messengers (angels) that God sends us in the form of family, friends, acquaintances and yes, even strangers. They are the ones that lift up our hands, when all strength has been taken from us. Sometimes in life, it's okay to ask for help when it gets overwhelming.

I know if I have a friend, family member or even a stranger that needs me for any reason, I will be there for them as well. As you bless others, let them also be a blessing for you in return.

Isaiah 6:8 -- "And I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?” Then I said, “Here I am! Send me.”

Psalm 91:11 -- "For He will command His angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways"

Psalm 34:7 -- "The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them."

2 Corinthians 5:20 "Now then, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were pleading through us: we implore you on Christ’s behalf, be reconciled to God."

James 1:2-4 -- “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”