Underdogs & Misfits

Remember Underdog? Some or most of you may be too young to remember him. He was a cartoon character who was a superhero. There was even a song about him. Where he was coming to save the day. I used to watch the cartoon as a child. As the show was starting, I used to sing along with the intro song. I think it is clever how the producers of this show named him after what is deemed negative when it comes to humans who are underdogs. Maybe there were some children who considered themselves underdogs that later in life reflected on this positive show. There was also the Toys on Misfit Island in the story of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer -- they were the forgotten toys, because they didn't function quite the way they should. In the end, they were rescued and distributed to children who could love them.

The underdogs are considered a person who has little status in society. It also can mean in competition, the team or person who is considered to be the one to lose the event or title they are attempting to win. When I think of these two definitions, it reminded me of how I sometimes felt like the underdog. Being of small stature and at one time, very timid, and had some awkward social traits because of my untreated autism, I was usually one of the last picked when it came to kids picking their team mates for a sport competition in school. Also, because my family in the earlier years of our childhood were considered poor, my appearance reflected it. Sometimes I remember being poor in my preteen years too, because the ladies at church were always giving me their daughter's hand me downs. I didn't mind though, because those clothes were usually 100 times better than the ones that my parents could afford. But, being that child who didn't have the trendy stuff could be rough at times and sometimes my hand me downs weren't exactly my size.

I always dreaded the beginning of the school year when new classmates and classes were formed. When kids would pick their seats and most of the time, someone would sit down next to me merely because that was the last seat available. I loved when the teacher would assign the seats, because that would eliminate the need to pick seats and the embarrassment of not having someone wanting to sit next to me. This conundrum also extended into field trip partnering. At some point in my childhood, I gained a best friend who was at my grade level and I could always guarantee that she would be sitting next to me or wanted to until we used to start talking in class. By sixth grade, I had developed a wonderful group of friends, until the dreaded lice experience, then I immediately became the underdog again. Also during these years in school, I gravitated toward the underdogs that no one wanted to associate with, because I know how they felt to be rejected and bullied. Ironically, sometimes even those kids didn't want to associate with me when I attempted to be friends with them. Let's just say, socially, I had some challenges.

During the process of other kids getting to know me, they would find out that I had a step father, rather than my biological father like them.  Divorce in the sixties wasn't considered acceptable. I used to think it was me why the parents didn't invite me back, but I guess it might have been also the household dynamics that would affect my friendships. My best friend in childhood also came from a broken home and that might be why we were able to build such a close bond. We had that in common. The difference was her biological father was very much in her life, where I didn't meet mine again until my early 20's. There was a time when my Mom questioned me about the kids who were befriending me, because she thought I probably shouldn't be hanging around them because their families were comfortably richer than ours. I told her that I didn't pick my friends for that reason, but rather because I just wanted to have friends. Usually, my friends picked me, because I didn't want to feel rejection anymore. It was soon after that, I wasn't able to hang around my best friend anymore. When I was in eighth grade, I found out from a mutual friend of mine and my best friend that my best friend had been killed in a car accident that year.  That broke my heart.

I struggled in public middle school and the first two years of high school with making friends. This might have been due to my trauma I endured from 11-13. My Mom used to wonder why I was isolating myself. It seemed if I made a friend she didn't like, I wasn't allowed to hang around with them. I don't think she ever realized it may not have been about me, but rather her not letting me select and keep my own friends. At some point, I just quit trying. They could never meet her standards, which to be honest was skewed. I had church friends and my cousins during this time and before who accepted me for who I am. They kept me from being completely isolated. My last two years in high school were the best times of my life. I was able to meet and keep friends who had a common interest in the arts and music. I had grown musically and artistically and was very involved in drama and any class having to do with music and art. I was in choir, madrigals and chamber singers. Let's just say I was able to let my friends see my heart and not be judged so much about my outer appearance or my family's social economic status. However, now that I look at old pictures, I was pretty, but didn't have the confidence to know.

In adulthood, I was more easily able to make friends, because I took classes and got counseling to help me gain confidence in myself. When I had my own children, I was so glad that they weren't awkwardly social and were able to make friends easily. Of course by this time, I had a lucrative career and was able to provide for my children and they never went without. I was able to get them into extracurricular activities outside of school. I watched who my children hung out with, but I never interfered with their friend selections. Because I took them to church, they had pretty much selected pretty nice friends. Even if they selected kids who were a little rough on the edges, I didn't discourage those friendships. Because I knew my kids, I knew those friendships would dissolve on their own.

Jesus hung out with the underdogs. The so called misfits of the world and society. I know that during my times of when I was considered an underdog, Jesus walked by my side on a daily basis. I used to pray a lot during these periods of my life. I always pray, but I think during these years they may have been more fervent and pleading. I didn't understand the reasoning behind my experiences and I would ask God to help me accept them for what my circumstances were at the time. I also asked him to intervene when the suffering got too hard. There were days, I just wished I hadn't been born. But God pulled me through those dark times. To this day, I have such empathy for those who experience suffering at the hands of someone else. I have empathy to people who have lost hope to the point of ending their lives. I often wonder if only they could have hung on a little longer. From my personal experiences, I know that time can change the direction and there are happier times ahead, where life becomes bearable again. Quite often, and I know some do, I wonder if they believed in God. It has made such a difference in my life to have a Savior who loves me unconditionally for who I am warts and all.

Jesus's misfits of the Bible: Matthew, Zacchaeus, The Disciples, David, Paul, Shepherds. Jesus himself was born out of wedlock and from a humble background.

1 Corinthians 1:27 says: "But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong." (NIV)

Matthew 5:5 -- "Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth."

Romans 12:16 -- "Do not set your mind on high things but associate with the humble."

Romans 13: 9 -- "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." 

Romans 13:10 -- "Love does no harm to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfillment of the law."